This week was far more interesting than it deserved to be. Duke footage, Crytek news, and cool Fallout clocks. Add a little corporate craziness and we've got ourselves an article.

Duke Nukem Forever
First gameplay footage squeaks out. Stuff blows up. Minds still blown that it exists.

Time Warner Cable
Field-testing max bandwidth caps of 40GB a month, all for only $55. So much for our Desperate Housewives HD downloads.

Jack Thompson
Recommended for extra-special, decade-long disbarment. In other news, Diablo 3 to be set in Antarctica.

Crytek
Says it will no longer develop PC-exclusive games. Ends Crysis support. Announces PC-exclusive Crysis Warzone. Who's on first?

Forbes
Claims the iPhone could kill the Nintendo DS. In other news, airplanes could totally kill cars.

Take-Two
Phenomenal Grand Theft Auto 4 profits easily cover the company's legal battle against EA hostile takeover. Wanted level increased.

Resident Evil 5
Racist? Not racist? Who knows. Either way, between this and Far Cry 2, "welcome to Africa," gamers.

Fallout 3 Survival Edition
We're tripping over ourselves to grab one of those clocks. But where's our official Vault Tech/Brita filter?

"We are healthy."

LucasArts public relations director Margaret Grohne, after confirming layoffs of between 75 and 100 LucasArts employees.

"They're essentially mini-finales. But we hate to use the word 'mini.'"

Valve writer Chet Faliszek, explaining "crescendo events" in his company's zombie shooter Left 4 Dead.

"And here I thought gamers liked long endings!"

Metal Gear Solid 4 associate producer Ryan Payton, squashing rumors that the game will feature 90-minute cutscenes.